Discover Nikkei

https://www.discovernikkei.org/en/interviews/clips/828/

Americanized values (Japanese)

(Japanese) About three years ago, I took my husband to Japan for the first time. Alright, so this is really not a big deal, but my husband sat down near the tea pot/dispenser. From my perspective, it was just a matter of convenience, so I asked him if he could pour some tea. He happily obliged, pushing down on the dispenser and enjoying the noise it made. But then my mother and sister-in-law, who were watching this next to us, were in disbelief, saying, “I can’t believe you’re making your husband do that.” To me, it was just like… well he’s the one who’s close to the pot, so he might as well do it, right? And that’s when I came to a realization about my Americanized values. Another time, my brother’s wife was going to treat us to shelled oysters. So she goes out and buys them, and she’s in the kitchen by herself, gloves on and all, working hard to dig out the oysters from the shells. So I’m watching this, and I volunteered my husband to help, telling her to “Let David do it.” This kind of stuff is really tough to do, and I felt bad for her. Then she turns to me and says something like “Please, just quit saying things like that.” David’s standing there confused because he doesn’t understand Japanese, but I told her, “oh come on, you should let the men do the tough jobs like these.” Maybe my family is just ultra-conservative, but it made me think: can I not say or do things like that in a traditional Japanese household? I’m hoping that times will change, little by little. We shouldn’t think too much about what men should be doing, or what women are supposed to do—whoever can do it should be the ones who do it. But that kind of reasoning doesn’t really seem to fly with my mother.


Date: March 1, 2007

Location: California, US

Interviewer: Yoko Nishimura

Contributed by: Watase Media Arts Center, Japanese American National Museum

Interviewee Bio

Yumi Matsubara was born and grew up in Gifu prefecture in Japan. Growing up in a conservative family in Japan, she didn’t tell her parents that she was moving to Los Angeles, California, to improve her English. She first attended an English language school for a couple of months before studying fashion at the Fashion Institute of Design & Merchandising (FIDM) in Los Angeles. After she graduated from FIDM in 1994, she started working in the fashion industry.

Around this time, her desire to make a permanent home in the United States was growing. Her company agreed to support her green card (permanent residency), so she started the green card process. In 1999, however, the financial situation of her company deteriorated and she left the company before she received her U.S. permanent residency. She decided to marry an American citizen in November 1999 after just two weeks of dating. She received her green card in May 2001 and her American citizenship in December 2006. Currently, she works in the fashion industry in Los Angeles where she serves as a grader* and spec writer. (March 1, 2007)

* Grader: a person who produces scaled versions of an original pattern to produce clothes across a range of sizes and fits.

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